We all at some point feel the pain of backstabbing or wrongdoing. It hurts. Rather than displaying your anger, defer it instead of acting on it.

If you’ve been done wrong, do right. As in Prov 19:11

The discretion of a man deferreth his anger; and it is his glory to pass over a transgression.

There are several verses in Scripture that echo this wisdom in exercising prudence and patience, such as Prov 14:29, Mat 5:22, Mat 5:44, Col 3:13, Eph 4:32, and Jas 1:19 to name a few.

I’ve been the victim of my own anger, self-inflicting pain on top of hurt. Hold off on your anger. It helps no one, and the pain just lasts longer.

Forgiveness is a muscle. Exercise often.

A young child grabs hold of the leg of their parent, sometimes in order to hide, often simply for safety. But what about as adults? Is there an Olly Olly Oxen Free place? A pillar of safety like the old oak tree or a parent’s leg?

Prov 18:10

The name of the LORD is a strong tower: the righteous runneth into it, and is safe.

Whenever I read or recall this verse, or whenever I feel a bit scared about something, this song also comes to mind:

Hide Thou Me

There is a difference between swallowing your words and sparing your words.

Swallowing your words happens after you say the words. Sparing your words happens before they come out.

Even a fool look’s wise in his silence. Looking in Prov 17:27-28

He that hath knowledge spareth his words: and a man of understanding is of an excellent spirit.

In Jas 1:19, we are told to be swift to hear, slow to speak.

In wisdom: Spare Your Words.

There seems to be a trendy topic about Resting Bad Face or something like that. It’s what your relaxed-like-no-one-is-watching face shows. And sometimes, it’s not a cheerful face.

Does your resting face turn downward in a frown? Is your countenance in a cowering slope at your lips or brow?

Rather than checking your face, maybe you should check your heart

Prov 15:13 A merry heart maketh a cheerful countenance: but by sorrow of the heart the spirit is broken.

Our face reveals what’s in our heart. Is your heart merry?

I once heard someone say, “If there’s a Godly battle, I want to be in the middle of it – because that’s where God will be.”

Awhile back, we had a hard work before us. Through patience, perseverance, and prayer, we believe in our heart the work was profitable for sake of Christ. It was a Kingdom work. It was hard work. It was messy work. And it was profitable work.

Prov 14:4 Where no oxen are, the crib is clean: but much increase is by the strength of the ox.

Sometimes, there will be messy work. If there is never a messy work, is it really a work? I’m not suggesting you should ever leave the mess. Every day brings its own mess. At the end of the day, we clean the mess of the day. Tomorrow could bring a different mess.

Messy doesn’t necessarily mean bad. Hard doesn’t necessarily mean terrible. To never have a mess, one could wonder is there a progress or profit in the work.

Some of the worst moments of my life are the words and works puffed up and pumped out because of my pride. Whenever I find myself start to get upset, I do my best to take a moment and assess, is this just pride talking?

Only by pride cometh contention: but with the well advised is wisdom. – Prov 13:10

Only by pride comes contention:

• Road rage – Pride.
• Someone tardy for an appointment or didn’t come through on an agreement – Pride.
• Didn’t get proper service – Pride.
• Think about your last argument or fight – Pride.

At the core of your mighty stance? Pride with a capital “P”.

Jas 3:16 talks about envy and strife and its roommates, confusion and every evil work. Envy and strife are contentious bedfellows.

And the root of contention? Only by pride comes contention.

The way of a fool is right in his own eyes: but he that hearkeneth unto counsel is wise. ~ Prov 12:15

It can be so frustrating. Asking a friend for advice or even simply to listen without the advice, and they give us … what? Their opinion, often contrary to our own. So we go pick another friend to “bounce our idea” on – and we keep doing that until we find someone to justify our rightness (not our righteousness, but our desire to be correct).

You know what else can be frustrating? When we tell someone what we think and they disagree. What is it about our nature that makes us want to be right? At least once, all the time.

Pride.

This pride often comes packaged up with custom-fitted wisdom blockers, to cover our ears and eyes so we can focus on our own rightness (not our righteousness, but our desire to be correct).

The counsel of God’s word, in study and prayer. The counsel of Godly friends and family, with the cover of prayer and an open Bible nearby. The counsel of patience, and of prudence, and of perspective.

The path of rightness and the path of righteousness are divergent. Only one is worth fighting for.

Prov 11:13 – A talebearer revealeth secrets: but he that is of a faithful spirit concealeth the matter.

We should always speak the truth (Eph 4:25), but does that mean we should speak every truth? Gossiping lips are not limited to a lying tongue. Gossip can also be when a truth that should be left unsaid is shared with others.

This sharing of “inside info” is a prideful action, isn’t it? Sort of an “Wouldn’t you like to know what I know” type of position.

Gossip leaks. Prudence protects.

One of the best resources and studies on this topic is Resisting Gossip by Matt Mitchell. A great individual read or group study.

In some ways, it seems as if we are living in an era where mischief and lies leading to another person’s fall or failure is like a sport. We laugh at videos of falls and failures and share them like LOLcats.

Slander and falsehoods are the tools of this trade, and social media has become the soap box on which to stand up and throw down.

Prov 10:23 To do evil is like sport to a fool, But a man of understanding has wisdom.

Even during such stormy times, we can be comforted with Prov 10:29-30, not by our own strength, but by the Lord’s strength.

If you encounter the sport of wrongdoing, don’t compete. In some ways, it’s better to just walk away.